Thursday, 6 October 2016

Dear Gloria, he wants to frustrate me

Dear Gloria.
Top of the day to you and a happy belated birthday to you. I pray that your life be as beautiful as your face. Also i want to thank you for this awesome privileged you are giving to your readers to express themselves and share their pains.

My name is Phillipa(not real name) and am 29 years old. It all started in 2009 when i met this guy. I was very young then and i now believe he took advantage of that innocence.
In 2010, i became pregnant and he pleaded with me to terminate the pregnancy and as stupid as i was, i yielded and had it terminated.

The relationship continues with frequent unprotected sex. Then, the following year 2011 i got pregnant again and vowed that i wasn't going to terminate this as he claim to love me, and he has a fairly good job, we can start from there. But alas that was where my nightmare started as the beatings and abuse i suffered after then is something i can't put in letters.

Anyways, i had my son December, 5th 2011 and since then i didn't hear from him as he changed his location, number and everything i could have used to contact him.

The parents didn't help issues. They supported his actions until i later learnt that he has a girl in Italy who they wanted him to marry because she has been of great assistance to them.
Now he has surfaced from nowhere and demands that he wants to see his son i bluntly refused and he has been threatening me. Let me also state that my family is the best ever. They gave me their full support all through my ordeal. My child is somewhere safe and has just started school, i have gotten a small job now he wants to give me headache. What do i do?

Thanks dear for taking out time to write to us. Thanks also for your birthday wishes to me. I will go straight to the point.
Firstly, having sex with a man you are not married to, is known as fornication and it's a sin let alone having unprotected sex. Even if you weren't afraid of God, what about diseases? Now that the deed has been done i hope you have known better.
Secondly, please report at the nearest police station about his threat as i don't advice anyone to take a threat for granted. 80% of people carry out their threats.
Thirdly, look for an NGO who is grounded on issues like this and report.

Note that, i listed the above actions because according to your mail, his coming back wasn't for peace but violence. If he had come peacefully and sincerely apologized for all he made you go through (because without stating, i can imagine the pains you went through) i would have advised you forgive him and allow him play his fatherly role to his son but since the reversed is the case, your safety and that of your son, is paramount.
I wish you the best.

To all men out there who treat woman like piece of rag. Have you thought for one minute if your sister is treated same way, would you be happy?  If you are responsible enough to sleep with a girl, you should be responsible enough to take full responsibility of your action. Gone are the days when you eat your cake and still have it back.

Share your thoughts on this please.


  1. go and report him at the police station jawe.

    yeye man

  2. I think you should report this case to the police, just for your safety! Am so sorry you are passing through all these.

  3. I think you should report this case to the police, just for your safety! Am so sorry you are passing through all these.

  4. Just try and make a case please men can be anything.

    A trial will convince you . Join me here for more information

  5. See which son please? You had an abortion for him and you continued with unprotected sex? That's gros my dear,women need to be wiser this is 21st century,and that's why I love she do tell most lady's on her blog if they refused to be wise,they will lose woefully because in every relationship,women lose most, and she tells you to dump the guy fast immediately you notice those bad signs.anyway no matter how you drag it,a child has the right to know who his father is,just let them know each other for future purpose not that you gonna give him the child.
    Most male kids are very funny these days,they must ask of their dad when they grow up,so just save yourself the stress and let them meet each other.


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