Thursday, 28 January 2016

Dear Gloria they are forcing me to marry a mad woman

Yayyyy it's our very first mail for the year. This blog reader called me and i encouraged him (yes "him") to send a mail so that we can all exchange ideas and air our opinions.
See the not so lengthy mail below:

Dear Gloria,
Like i told you before, i met this girl through a friend and we dated for only few months when she told me she was pregnant (though i told her that before marriage she should get preggy).

Though i was happy but wasn't expecting conception to happen so quickly because at that point in time i was really broke, business was slow and money seems not to be coming from anywhere soon.

I accepted and told her to keep the baby but i couldn't sponsor a  wedding at that point. After about two months of her pregnancy, i in company of my eldest brother (my dad is old and stays in the village) went to see her parents. The visit to my would-be inlaws, wasn't meant to be a proper introduction, rather, it's for me to know her parents(and where they stay) and plan on the next move. I was however, surprised when i got there and met a small crowd of people and the father accused me of not coming with my entire family for the introduction. My explanation that i ought to know them first then pick a date for a proper intro, fell on deaf ears
After the first visit, my elder brother that went with me told me to pray very well that he sensed a foul play. (how can they be so quick to prepare for an intro without even knowing me nor receiving a Koko from me). The intro was put on hold as business hasn't picked up and i was getting more broke by the day.

Fast forward to two months after she had our baby (she has sinced moved in with me), one night in presence of her mum who came to do omogwo, she woke up in the middle of the night and started acting abnormally. Thinking it was a joke, the abnormality increased by daybreak and reality dawned on me that i am face to face with a mad person. Neighbours came to my rescue and manage to tie her down. People said alot of things. Some said blood entered her head and so many other stuffs but my instinct told me she has had that issue before especially when i remember how they wanted to force me to pay her dowry (yes they did) so i ask the mother to take her home for proper care as my one room apartment cannot contain her plus her drama. She has since been with her parents since May last year. But the issue now is that her family, is threatening me that i must come and marry her or else they would deal with me.
Let me also mention that since she came into my life, things have gone from bad to worse that i have sold most of my property just to pay off accumulated debt.

I don't want to marry again but the family said i must marry her that she has been treated and she is ok now. What if the madness comes again? I don't even have money, business almost closed up i am confused please you people should advise me.

Over to you guys....


  1. The poster should go and find a strong and real man of God to help him out.. From every indication, the family of the woman has something hidden which he doesn't know.... Its more of a spiritual case. The man should be very prayerful and extremely careful. That woman has history of madness which he didn't know and am sure the family knows where the madness has come from

  2. hmmm.. speechless.......

  3. This is a very sensitive issue. There is no disputing the fact that she has a mental problem which needs to be treated ASAP else, there's no way you would enjoy that marriage. Don't really know what advise to give you other than for you to seek the face of God in prayer and ask for His directive on how to handle this situation.

    Alabekee's Blog

  4. This situation is really dicey... You shuldnt hve said she shuld get pregnant bfr marriage..dts a wrong move..

    Glowyshoes's blog

    My Facebook

  5. If u love her, go on and marry her, God heals n blesses us through various ways/people.. As for the threat, ask for God's guidance to lead and protect u...

    Greetings from.... leXHansplaCE

  6. What happen has happened, forget about marriage for now, I think what you need do is to save her from the strange illness first, any other things can follow afterward. visit my
    Blog and learn more about your relationship

  7. How can you take somebody's daughter and impregnate her without first thinking of the future. Young men of these days, always taking things so lightly. You told her to get pregnant before marriage while u are not ready for marriage. Am so pissed at this story right now. Poster what were u thinking when u spilled ur seed in her and get her pregnant? She also lived with u without a dowry and her foolish mother came for omugwo in ur house. Am so speechless by all these.

    Whatever u do now cannot erase the fact she's the mother of ur child. You have that bond with her, it's something u cannot undo.

    It's so sad to see young people messing with their future and destiny.

    I don't know what to tell u but good luck and to be careful before the girls family will strike u with madness too.

    Visit Milysblog

    1. I love to see women handling issues like this with Wisdom! God bless you Miriam!

      Gloria dear how are you doing?*smiles*

    2. Miriam, you have live in my mind. Your comment did it for me.

      Let him run to God.

  8. speeechless...Goto Godin prayers

  9. Hmmm. Pray and pray again after asking for forgiveness though.


    "For better for worst" I guessed that was what you promised her before pregnancy? You needed the baby badly then I think? Now she has little challenges, you want to run. That's not possible.

    That your personal economy is unstable is not an excuse...atleast you've given birth and who takes the responsibilities?

    That's the problem with young guys, na free things go kill guys..."meeting a lady few months and having uncontrollable intercourse to the point of pregnancy is like getting a free ride".

    Simple Solution

    Get yourself together, tell your people, fix a date, go to her house, see her hand in marriage, pay her dowry, bring her home as your wife.

    Both of you should fast and pray, seek for forgiveness and He(God) shall forgive you. I pray there won't be any further problem again.

    Stop claiming they are forcing their daughter on you faaaa...what do you expect them to do? Do you expect them to keep her with the pregnancy or baby? Fear God faaaa. Tor.


Thanks soooooo much for stopping by my blog! i'd love to know your thoughts about this post. Kindly drop a comment please.

Connect with me!!!
Facebook - Gloria Okaiman
LinkedIn - Gloria Okaiman
Pinterest - Gloria Okaiman
Twitter - @glophilus
Instagram - @gloriafinesblog
Email -

Google+ Followers

Designed only by Tunde Sanusi (Tuham)